Getting dumped sucks. You start the day in a relationship, and by the end of the day you’re left with nothing but a swirling mishmash of emotions. And when the emotions begin to congeal into thoughts, most of them are not very happy.

But in such pain there are opportunities for growth. And one such area is one’s mindfulness practice.

You will find yourself thinking about your ex numerous times throughout the day, thinking about the times you spent together, the things you imagined doing together, and the things you maybe wish you’d done differently. These thoughts continue to pop up in your mind without your meaning them to be there, and can take you down mental rabbit holes which you never intended to enter. In this way, these thoughts are much the same as the more mundane thoughts that enter you mind during mindfulness practice. And because these thoughts are much the same in the way they’re unintentionally created, they can then be handled in the same way as our meditation thoughts.

Unfortunately, they will likely be even more stubborn as there is now more raw emotion attached to them. But the process remains the same, and is simple in theory:

1. Focus on your breath
2. When a thought arises recognize the thought and acknowledge it; don’t feel guilty for the thoughts
3. Let the thought go
4. Return to step 1

Life’s challenges are often the best opportunities for growth. While breakups are difficult times of our lives, we can come out of them as stringer versions of ourselves. Recognizing the process of working through a breakup as an opportunity to strengthen our mindfulness practice can help us to come out stronger on the other side.

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